Through an Amber Spyglass

[JAMES SIRIUS POTTER]

Muscles aching and head throbbing, James was slowly accepting the fact that extra Quidditch practice was not supposed to run into three hours. He had not even noticed the time passing, for he had been too busy trying new maneuvers, trying to get even better with the Quaffle. He had hobbled for the first few feet after touching ground, before upgrading to a slight limp.

Now he was walking back into the common room after freshening up, and donning some casual clothes. I wonder if Charlotte's there right now he wondered, wanting to see her. Though the relationship had begun casually, James was aware that he saw her less as a snogging machine, and more as a person with every passing day. Now his heart skipped a beat every time he saw here. James gritted his teeth, frustrated and unable to stop what was happening.

Stop...you know what happened the last time you saw someone that way he tried to tell himself futilely. How could words work a point where the mere sight of this girl made him weak at the knees. James was still keeping up the facade of the casual relationship, especially because he didn't want this to happen. He spoke the password to the Fat Lady absent-mindedly, strolling into the common room.

She was there. James swallowed nervously, trying to wet his dry throat. He took a deep breath, donning the mask under which he had begun this relationship. Her scent tantalized him as he walked closer to her. "Hello there," he whispered, "I could use a pleasant surprise after all that practice."

Tag: Charlotte Parker Notes: That set the tone

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[CHARLOTTE KYONG PARKER]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] -Through an Amber Spyglass- Three hour Quidditch practice was killer, especially while sick. Charlotte was working on finding the Snitch, and keeping it in sight. Rose didn’t want Charlotte catching the Snitch as soon as she saw it. Charlotte was instructed to find the snitch once Gryffindor was up at least fifty points. After practice, Charlotte had raced to the showers and washed the dirt and mud off. After cleaning, she stepped into some black skinnys, and a tank top. It was yellow at the shoulders, blue at the bust and tan the rest of the shirt. Charlotte didn’t feel like her normal self. She had lost weight, when you’re only sixty three inches tall, losing ten pounds was a lot. A normal weight for Charlotte was one hundred and eight pounds, give or take a few pounds. At the present moment, Charlotte guessed she was weighing in at ninety five pounds. The reason she was losing weight? Guilt. Charlotte had fooled around with Zachariah Montage. Zac, a sixth year Slytherin, and Charlotte had met at a party. They’d gotten drunk, and hooked up. Charlotte, the one who had demanded monogamy from James, had cheated. Charlotte looked up as James walked over. Her throat closed up, stomach did flip flops. She was falling for him and falling hard. “James, I need to tell you something.”

[/b]Charlotte paused, taking a deep breath. “I did something bad, something you’ll hate me for. But, I hooked up with Zachariah Montage. We were at a party, I was drunk. I’m so so so sorry, James.”[/b]
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tag: James!--- words: 257 --- outfit: here template by eliza @ shadowplay

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[JAMES SIRIUS POTTER]

James smiled as Charlotte began to talk, and twirled her hair around his finger idly. But he froze when he heard what she was talking about. No. This was happening again. Fucking hell! Now I remember why I stopped. This was NEVER supposed to happen again. Never never never! James stepped away from Charlotte like she was contagious.

He smiled bitterly, hatred and sadness pouring out of his eyes. "I'm sure that must have been just lovely. I supposed this marks the end of our little "deal" now doesn't it ," he half-laughed, half-snarled. He had been drunk plenty of times after they had gotten together. And girls were certainly of no shortage in the parties he had gone to. What had happened with him? Nothing!

He had trusted Charlotte to the point where he had actually revealed the Marauder's Map to her. He had made it clear through his gestures that he considered Charlotte far more important than what a normal friend-with-benefit would be. Of course, he had no right to be angry. This was all part of the deal right? The relationship ends when we decide it to He smiled mockingly at Charlotte, before storming to the fireplace. The fire glowed madder red, as though feeding off his anger.

Not my forte

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[CHARLOTTE KYONG PARKER]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] -Through an Amber Spyglass- “Please, James. I know. I know I screwed up,”

[/b]Charlotte said, looking down. “I don’t know what I was thinking. It was a horrible mistake, and I regret it one hundred percent.” [/b] Charlotte rushed off the couch, following James across the common room.

“James, Babe, please. I’m so sorry, and I swear, it will never happen again.” [/b]Charlotte wasn’t sure how she was hoping this would go. Did she want to go back to friends with benefits? No, Charlotte wanted more. She wanted a real commitment, a real relationship. Charlotte was tired of this in-between. They had the physical aspect of a relationship, the emotional aspect was starting to begin. What they didn’t have was the label, the publicness of a real relationship. Only a handful of people knew about James and Charlotte. The pair had zero public displays of affection, not even a chaste kiss.
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tag: James!--- words: 147 --- outfit: here template by eliza @ shadowplay
Sorry it sucks D:

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[JAMES SIRIUS POTTER]

James didn't feel angry anymore. Heck, maybe he shouldn't have gotten angry in the first place. This is all my fault after all. This wouldn't have hurt if I had been more careful, James tried to tell himself. Maybe it was true, but it didn't make him feel any better at that moment. He forced himself to listen to what Charlotte had to say.

"I really don't see how anything can happen after this Char," he said, sighing softly. He sat back on the couch, feeling more tired than three hours of extra Quidditch had made him. "Maybe it was a mistake. How does that change things? Montague, of all people! That guy will have posters out soon!" he exclaimed. Slytherin enmity had nothing to do with this, Montague was just a foul individual.

"I can honestly say that I'm not going to hold a grudge or anything like that. But this has already happened to me before. I don't want a third repeat. I really don't," he said.

Seeerious writer's block.

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[CHARLOTTE KYONG PARKER]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] -Through an Amber Spyglass- “I was upset, I was having a bad day. He was there, that is it. It was purely physical,” Charlotte stated slowly, choosing her words wisely. “James, what you and I have, it’s more than that. It is more than just physical, you have to know that,” sitting besides James, she curled her feet up underneath her. Charlotte had fallen for James, hook line and sinker. While Charlotte had never been in love before, she suspected that would soon change. In her mind, love wasn’t a switch. It wasn’t something that could be turned off and on whenever it pleased. “What do you mean, its happened before?” Charlotte asked, turning to face James. She fought the urge to cuddle up next to him. Something told her that James wouldn't respond well to that. Giving into the urge, she placed her hand in James’s, and interlaced her fingers with his. tag: James!--- words: 149 --- outfit: here template by eliza @ shadowplay

[JAMES SIRIUS POTTER]

James smiled sardonically, though the smile slid off halfway through. No matter how he felt, he couldn't bring himself to hurt Charlotte in a very serious way. This annoyed him more than anything else. "So, what can I expect the next time you have a bad day? I wonder what I do on my bad days..." James pretended to think,"Oh wait. I think last time I just flew a few rounds around the Quidditch pitch. But really, what you're suggesting sounds far more interesting. Anyone in front of my eyes, eh."

James was able vent some of his feelings with his last few words, injecting as much sarcasm as possible. He was then brought to a halt, as Charlotte latched onto his previous last words. Wonderful. What had slipped past his mouth unwittingly would now have to merit an explanation. He sighed, and decided to make the explanation short. Then he felt Charlotte slip her fingers through his, and his heart skipped a beat. He kicked himself mentally for still feeling that way.

"Well, let's see. Stupid guy falls for girl. They're happy for a while. She cheats. He gets heartbroken. Becomes phobic of anything more than physical relationships. Is now proving himself to be stupid once more. Simple story, really," James muttered. Just thinking about it made him clench his hands. I wonder how many drunken fests this one will require he thought, almost dispassionately. He had been trying his best to be a good model for Lily, at least on the outside.

Seeerious writer's block.

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[CHARLOTTE KYONG PARKER]

[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] -Through an Amber Spyglass- “James, I swear. I’m not this person. I don’ cheat, I hate people who do. I hate myself right now.” Charlotte twisted her into a loose pony tail and secured it. She always had hair binders on her small and slender wrists. The more she thought about what she had done, the more Charlotte hated herself. The more she thought about it, the more Charlotte couldn’t believe it. She was not that kind of person. She wasn’t a cheater, she wasn’t that kind of person. She was raised to be a respectful woman, to do right by others. Her mother would be so disappointed if she knew the kind of person Charlotte was. Charlotte felt a urge of jealousy, the idea of James dating someone else made her see green with envy. When James finished his story, she felt horrible. She did the same thing this ex did, only with Charlotte, it was worse. James entered the relationship hoping for a better outcome, and Charlotte fucked it up. “James, I can’t make you trust me. All I can do is apologize, and hope for the best.” Charlotte repositioned herself and placed her left hand on his neck. Playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck, she kissed him softly. “James, I’m so unbelievably sorry. I can swear to you, it will never happen again.” tag: James!--- words: 226 --- outfit: here template by eliza @ shadowplay

[JAMES SIRIUS POTTER]

James couldn't decide on what to do at all. On one hand, he wanted to stay angry, knock away Charlotte's hand, and walk away. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. The way she kept apologizing made him feel like he was the one at fault here, for not accepting her apologies. Even as he thought along these lines, the fight went out of him. He wanted nothing more than his bed, and damn the rest of the world.

James was about to act on his thought, and almost got up when Charlotte started speaking again. By the time she was done, James wanted to forgive her at the very least. Then she kissed him softly. Damn it all to hell, James swore violently to himself as he took Charlotte by the chin and kissed her fiercely. After a while, he pulled back, feeling lighter at heart, but still confused as to what he should do.

"That doesn't mean anything," James said emphatically as he rose up from the couch. "Do I forgive you? Yes, maybe. But that doesn't mean I'm ready to jump right back into the wagon. It's not a switch for me. Let's just see how it goes," he said and walked towards his dormitory slowly. The plans for the Marauder's Map would have to be put on hold. Two people were going to want to kill him.

Saying I have writer's block is starting to get redundant .

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